When I was teaching Lamaze Childbirth Classes in 1978 I was given this Parents Creed, from Lee Toth. My mentor and friend. I shared it with my classes over the next ten years – the message touched my heart.
And a woman who held a babe against her boson said: Speak to us of Children. And he said: your children are not your children. They are the sons and daughters of life’s longing for itself. They come through you but not from you, and though they are with you, they belong not to you. You may give them your love but not your thoughts, for they have their own thoughts. You may house their bodies but not their souls, for their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams. You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you. For life goes not backward not tarries with yesterday. You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth. – Gibran
As I read it again about 40 years later (still sorting, decluttering and pondering life), I realize how true it is – and how I was so nieve. One gets so wrapped up in the day to day of raising children I had forgotten the message I shared. Sorry boys for the times I tried to mold you to be something you weren’t meant to be. I love you just like you are. Now I have the opportunity to try again with my grandchildren and love those little souls, just as they are. To my sons, you are always in my mind and forever in my heart. Go forth! Love, Mom